WANT THE CHANCE TO WIN?
It's simple to participate. All you have to do is answer the following question in this post's comment section. The contest will end Friday night, July 16th @ 11:59pm. I'll enter everyone's name who answered the question into a drawing and announce the winner on my blog Saturday, July 17th.
QUESTION: What is the best new parent advice you have for my husband, Greg, and myself?
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My best parenting advice is just to relax and go with your gut. Mother's intuition is best, and you know all the right things to do. Just enjoy every minute because it goes by way.too.fast!
ReplyDeleteMy best piece of advice would be to stay calm, and enjoy every minute of being a parent.
ReplyDeleteIs the contest open to non-parents, too? =X I don't have kids yet, but I babysat extensively for close to a decade, and have a dozen cousins younger than myself. Something I was told more times than I can count is that sometimes, you just have to let them cry it out :] I believe it!
ReplyDelete<3 Amber
I would highly recommend cosleeping with your baby. I the bond is stronger and it proves to be more effective in having them become more independent as they grow because they felt that safety with you as they slept. I highly recommend reading the book The Science Of Parenting as well.
ReplyDeleteI don’t have children yet – but I spend my entire day surrounded by children of all abilities. One thing I’ve learned from the families I work with is that you should always trust yourself. Don’t get caught up in thinking someone else might know best, and don’t ignore your gut. Do exactly what feels best for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteI am not sure I am the best person to give advice, as I don't have a child myself... but one thing I have observed from my friends with little ones, is to not compare yourself to other moms and not compare your baby to any other baby. Every parents (maybe new parents especially) must have moments where they question themselves and/or their parenting skills, but I think there is a point of intuition that helps guide your parenting choices. And all babies get where they are going in their own time. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteI don’t have children yet – but I spend my entire day surrounded by children of all abilities. One thing I’ve learned from the families I work with is that you should always trust yourself. Don’t get caught up in thinking someone else might know best, and don’t ignore your gut. Do exactly what feels best for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteMy advice is - remember that your baby and your family are unique. Everything you read and hear needs to be processed through your lens of what makes sense for your family. Don't worry about percentilies, averages and norms. Watch and respond to your baby.
ReplyDeletexo
Lisa
I don't have any kids of my own yet but I have lots of younger siblings. Not sure if that counts. Anyways, my advice is expose your child to the different cultures of the world. If not by travel, then by studies because I find that lots of kids here in the states do not know that the world is a very diverse place. I think sometimes just knowing how others live can help us have a better understanding of our own lives.
ReplyDeleteMy best advice is: Enjoy every single moment, they grow up incredibly fast and try to write down things they say and do, as you will forget! All the hard and difficult stuff will just fall into place, so don't worry about that.
ReplyDeletehey kristen:
ReplyDeleteHow is kamea?I would love to win any book of yours though I have the whole set right??:)
Best parenting advice I can give is just go with the flow.Everday is different and a new and beautiful day,so enjoy yourselves thoroughly as they grow up so fast.Both of you get to sleep well as all of you will be happier and Mommy and daddy can have the best time with their kiddo.Children can sense if their parents are stressed out..Have fun...
lots of love to kamea and you too
hugs,
sharanya
I think my advice is similar to some of the others but it is so true that you have to learn when to hold your ground and when to let things go. I have been babysitting for over ten years and that has been my most important lesson for sure. When I started I thought every little thing was such a big deal. Eventually I learned that with kids you really just have to pick and choose your battles because if you can never let anything go you will go insane and be miserable.
ReplyDeleteGet in the habit of writing down the accomplishments and firsts - then when they get a bit older keep a journal of their funny sayings...they come up with some crazy comments :)
ReplyDeleteEnjoy!!
As a teenager, I don't feel very qualified to give advice, but I do a fair amount of babysitting, and I know many mothers. The one thing that they always seem to tell me about their children is, "I can't believe how quickly they grow up!"
ReplyDeleteSo, my advice is to treasure this time, though it seems to come with sleep deprivation and loads of anxiety. Someday you'll be looking back on this time fondly and wondering where the time went.
Hi Amber... totally open to non parents! I think your advice is great in that sometimes babies just cry - that's how they communicate (but it sure can be hard to listen to - lol)! Thank you for commenting :)
ReplyDeleteXOXO,
Kristen
Tweeted about ya!
ReplyDeleteFacebooked ya too! :-)
ReplyDeleteHi Kristen! I'm hoping that leaving a separate comment for each of these entries is what you were looking for. I wrote about your giveaway on my blog
ReplyDeletehttp://recoveringpessimist.blogspot.com/2010/07/kristens-raw-giveaway.html
My aunt told me to always say YES when someone offers to give you a hand. Whether it's vacuuming, bringing a dish over, going grocery shopping... if someone offers, jump on the occasion and say yes to them.
ReplyDeleteHi Kristen! I think the best advice is to just do what you *feel* is right for Kamea - intuition is there for a reason, no?
ReplyDeleteDon't be afraid to ask for and/or get help, even in little ways. Share the load, especially with each other.
ReplyDeleteBe confident in your knowledge of how to care for your new little one, but do not be so confident or afraid that you do not ask the older and wiser or more experienced for advice when you are feeling a touch insecure. Advice is free, but mistakes can be costly.
ReplyDeleteAck! Looks like my first entry didn't go through.
ReplyDeleteMy advice to you as parents is to TRUST YOURSELVES! I've seen first time parents save their kids' lives because they trusted their instincts. Nobody knows your baby better than you do. And never worry about being too paranoid. For a first time parent, its pretty much not possible to be too paranoid. :-)
i would say for you both to be more open to what your children teach you than what you can teach your children. that really works - their behaviour is very telling and you as their primary caregivers will learn what it is they are telling you - at any age. i have two teens now and i'm still learning. i feel so fortunate :)
ReplyDeleteI'm a nonparent too, but I would say to believe in yourself and your husband to know what's best for your baby and your family and like Krysta said to not compare yourselves to others. Also, life isn't perfect and it's ok to make mistakes, even as a Mamma =)
ReplyDeleteWhat a generous giveaway, thanks for the chance!
I second the suggestion about cosleeping, as it was tremendously helpful in ensuring everyone got a good night's sleep. There was no need to get up for feedings or to return a just-fed baby to a crib--latch on before you and the nursling are even fully awake, and then both drift back off.
ReplyDeleteTo that, I'd add find yourself a baby sling/carrier that your baby can nurse in. There were so many times in the early, early days when my baby was in perma-latch mode, and being able to carry him around the house made all the difference. :)
On a more general note--just enjoy getting to know this amazing little person. My son is seven and he just really blows our minds on a regular basis with the things he comes up with!
Hi Kristen... The best advice I can give you is to trust your self and the process of growing into parenthood! Love that baby and enjoy every minute! This wonderful stage doesn't last for long, and before you know it they are growing up, and have so much of their own minds. Believe in yourself and communicate with your hubby about how you want to raise your child. Wishing you the best of luck!
ReplyDeleteI think that loving and enjoying your baby comes naturally and easy. I think it's important for you to create a pattern for your baby, a predictable and rythmic life where she will not what follows next and it will help her feel secure and loved.
ReplyDeleteI am not a parent yet, but I do have a dog... that counts right? :) My advice would be to remember that you learn as you go. You are not going to be an expert at parenting right off the bat. It's one big learning experience for both you and your husband! :)
ReplyDeleteMy best piece of advice is that you should not let it be quiet when the baby is sleeping. When Katie Ann was sleeping I would vacuum, watch TV, talk on the phone, and play music. It really helped. No matter where we were or what was going on, her naps were always great. It made life much easier.
ReplyDeleteI also want to reiterate the others that say trust your instincts. Stand by your convictions. And for SURE sleep when the baby sleeps!!!
Being consistent... as simple as that :)
ReplyDeleteTweeted, Facebooked, and added you to my blog. http://ruminationsandilluminations.blogspot.com/2010/07/kristens-raw-24th-awesome-giveaway-free.html
ReplyDeleteAs a parent of 4 the best advice I can give is enjoy your time with Kamea as time goes by so quickly. Also as she grows and becomes independent, be patient, communicate and always be consistent with your words and actions.
ReplyDeleteThe first thought that came to mind was to relax and trust your instinct because it will never steer you wrong, but someone else already said that! LOL Still true, though.
ReplyDeleteMy other bit of advice, as the mom of two grown kiddos, would be to establish a regular bedtime from the get-go and try not to deviate from it. I did this almost from the time mine were newborns and it served me [and my sanity] very well as they grew older. A toddler who gets away with staying up at night is a cranky, screaming nightmare the next day!
Tough question!
ReplyDeleteI think the best thing I can say is:
enjoy each moment, each milestone, for what it is - don't always be hungering after the next stage, step, etc.
and - (sorry, I have to give more than one!)
Realize that your children are NOT min-you's, they are not sub-people, they are not somehow 'less' - less deserving of respect, attention, autonomy, etc. just because of their age. They are individual people. You don't own them - you are gifted with the opportunity to teach them and help shape them as they grow.
Janice
It's not "parenting" advice, but it advice for a new parent. Make time for your spouse! As all-consuming as a new baby can be, make time to maintain your closeness with your spouse. Ensure that you don't drift apart as you each focus on the child.
ReplyDeleteI would suggest teaching basic sign language to your baby. My best friend did this and she was able to communicate with her daughter before she was able to speak such as water, food etc. Worth looking in to! :)
ReplyDeleteHola lovely heart... I'm a new mama too... My daughter is three months old and such a blessing. Tge lesson I have learned the most is for new parents to be really, really gentle with each other. And for me to let my love work out his own methods and ways with our daughter instead of jumping in all the time. Just love love love and even more love!!
ReplyDeleteI think I'm a terrible advice-giver...:) but...I think the thing I wish I would have done a better job of earlier on was speaking up for myself. I think I needed to learn the art of knowing when to speak up for myself and knowing when to smile, nod, and let it go. I always thought of an intelligent reply that would have made me feel better to say, after the fact. (And I think this ultimately, unfortunately, led to strife between my husband and me and amongst our families.) Family members constantly giving me advice was overwhelming to me - but that was mostly because I didn't agree with it. Most people have super great advice, though, like all of the above.
ReplyDeleteCherish and savour every moment of your precious buddle of joy(children tend to grow up so fast in this tehnological age), enjoy her!
ReplyDeleteExcellent question Kristen:)
xoxox
I blogged about your giveaway! http://veganandsoforth.blogspot.com/2010/07/eggplant-bacon.html
ReplyDeleteMy youngest little guy is just two months older than Kamea, and I have been loving the chance to re-live the newborn days, in a much more relaxed state. I was a nervous new mommy with my first, and it is great to enjoy my new baby without the stress of inexperience. So my advice is - give Kamea a sibling! All in good time of course :) I'm sure you're nowhere near jumping off that bridge just yet.
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely not a mom yet so I don't really know but I would just say
ReplyDelete"try your best!"
and smile :)
The best advice I can give is "nothing" God gave You and ur husband this angel knowing and trusting that there isn't any two more equipt to raise, love and bring you sweet lil girl to her called destiny!!!! <3 Nicole
ReplyDeleteMy advice is to make sure you make time for yourself and your husband. It is easy to get completely absorbed with your baby & forget to take care of each other! Date nights, flirting and just alone time is a really great way to re-connect with each other.
ReplyDeleteContinue to date and love your spouse! Seeing your parents love each other is amazing:-)
ReplyDeleteTWEET!! http://twitter.com/bugbitestoyfood
ReplyDeleteBlogged ya!
ReplyDeleteDon't stress too much, and appreciate every minute because your baby will grow so fast!!
ReplyDeleteI am totally reading all these responses! I am not a mom yet (as you know) but I am going to say, soak it in. Enjoy every little moment of looking into that baby girls beautiful eyes!
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome give away. I'm a mother of a soon to be one year old and can't say that I'm an expert, but I would say cherish each moment. It's like they say those sweet little ones grow up so fast. It is a such a special time. It's important to (as cheesy as it sounds) marvel at the miracle. Also, follow your intuition...parents (especially mothers) know.
ReplyDeleteMy advice would be to stay consistent. It's not only important for young children, but teenagers benefit from this as well. Consistency in discipline is especially important - talking from first-hand experience.
ReplyDeleteI have a 9 months old wonderful son. I enjoyed reading all these advice.
ReplyDeleteEven if I would have loved to come with something really poetic, for your husband I'll say this (thinking of my husband and how he turned from being nervous for not having time to relax to being happy with our son): do not plan to do something relaxing, I mean do not plan anything, because you won't have the chance and then you'll be nervous. Plan only to spend time with your wonderful daughter.
I saw in my family that if he came from work planning to surf the net, and the little one (and me) would not let him, he would be very nervous, and the child too. But if he sat down and relax enjoying his son, just looking at him, talking to him, playing with him, then my son would be happy and my husband too.
Another advice, just like someone said before, listen to your heart. We had plenty of people telling us to let him cry in his bed alone because he'll get used to it and stop. He'll get used to what? To having a mom he could not trust to comfort him, to solve whatever is bothering him? He did not cry just to make us angry. He had a need. Our problem was, as we discovered later, reflux. And I was happy that I listened to my son and took care of him the way he wanted to, even if that meant for him to sleep on me (me sitting in an armchair) during the day, and on his father during the night for the first 5 months... At least he knows now that he can rely on me.
http://twitter.com/raluk16 tweeted!
ReplyDeleteKnow that you will question lots of things and b/c every child/parent relationship is and feels different no amount of advice will make sense like following your instincts and what feels "right" in any given situation. It appears that you guys think outside the box to begin with so hopefully this will be a comfort that no book or doctor can bring you. Good luck and have FUN!!!
ReplyDeleteOoh I love this giveaway! And what a great question.
ReplyDeleteMy advice would be to always be open and honest with your kids. My mom always did that, answering any question I ever had, not answering more than I had asked, and never dumbing anything down for me (even when I asked her when I was 10 if she had ever smoked pot!).
Read with your baby and continue to read together throughout your child's life. My three children are grown and a love of reading and books has helped them to be thoughtful, intelligent, productive people. When they were teens and not likely to want to read aloud, we sometimes enjoyed audiobooks together on road trips. I truly believe it helps their brains develop and teaches them to think and also how to communicate. My kids still fondly remember their favorite children's books.
ReplyDeleteMy advise is to savor each day. Every child is different and as they grow you will figure out together what they need. Each moment they grow, change and evolve into such wonderful little people. Love, love and love some more!
ReplyDeleteEven though I dont have a child myself yet, I beleive you just have to be yourself. Do what works for you and your child. Realize that your baby is going to make new sounds, odors, ect as she gets older that is normal for developing childeren that new parents get worried about. You being relaxed is going to help your baby relax.
ReplyDeleteMy best advice is to read read read!! Read everything you can, that way you as a parent can make the best decision for you and your family. You will have all the facts and with your motherly instincts, you will make the right choice.
ReplyDeleteMy advice comes in the form of a poem I heard somewhere a long time ago, and I've always taken it to heart:
ReplyDeleteCleaning and dusting can wait til tomorrow,
For babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow,
So fly away cobwebs and dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.
(author unknown to me)
Take a photograph every day so that when you little one is older you can both look back at their evolution of growth!
ReplyDeleteMy only piece of advice is to learn how to relax more. To disconnect from commercial media (internet, tv, cell phone, etc.), other voices (family, friends), and necessary chores (laundry, food, etc.)...and simply breathe. Seriously...Lamaze, meditation, whatever you have done in the past. I used to have asthma and would do breathing exercises that I had learned to help control. I was a researcher so I overloaded & overwhelmed myself constantly...I wonder if you are similar.
ReplyDeleteSo, in one word...breathe. Get away, disconnect, and let go. I used to do this when my little one was nursing. That way our breathing would even match and I could decompress. Perhaps your husband can even join in...perhaps holding hands, or some sort of skin to skin contact with you and Kamea...and breathe together. Nothing else. :)
I tweeted your giveaway. :) @LivngRawByGrace
ReplyDeleteThe best advice I got was "kids are not as fragile as you're going to think they". This was tough for me to grab onto, but very true. And my advice is every night you put your little one to bed, be present and grateful, even if it's just a few moments, be fully there. My son is three now and I still thank him every night for choosing me to be his mommy. It is truly an honor.
ReplyDeleteI facebooked your giveaway as well: Living Raw By Grace (group & page)..so twice!
ReplyDeleteI believe the best advice for any parent is simply to allow your child to grow into their own person. Allow them to live freely, explore the world, indulge their curiosity, and learn on their own. Provide a foundation, but let them blossom on their own. Too many parents try to create little mini versions of themselves!
ReplyDeleteI'm a mom to four, 3 boys & 1 girl, and my advice is to love abundantly, discipline graciously, and to diligently teach your children values & morals. It's especially important for dads to take time to establish a loving and deep relationship with his daughter and to be her protector.
ReplyDeleteI’m not a parent but I’m a daughter. The one thing I appreciate the most about my mom’s parenting was her ability to explain the most complex things in the simplest ways whatever my age.
ReplyDeleteExample: At the age of 4, after it had rained so hard, I found a cup of liquid in the window seal (left by a family member). I drank the clear liquid thinking it was water and became ill for a couple of hours. My mom took that opportunity to set up a display of about 6 clear liquids that looked like water. She had me smell them and pour them on something. The point was to teach me that everything is not what they seem.
Oh! I also appreciate my mom's honesty.
I have a few bits of advice:
ReplyDelete- We've made our marriage a priority and work on it daily.
- Go with the flow, not every nap, feeding, diaper change, bath or bedtime will be exactly on schedule all the time.
- Don't sweat the small stuff...and most of it is small stuff.
- Our actions/example teach more than any words out of our mouths ever could. From the way we treat our spouse to the way we discipline, the kids see it all. Be deliberate.
Enjoy these precious baby days...
Amy, mom of 3
http://twitter.com/Tallulah_Kidd
ReplyDeleteI Twittered the Post!
tweeted
ReplyDelete@cherrycobbler
My best advice is to enjoy the moment, allow yourselves to be the parents your hearts want to be, and allow baby to be a baby.
ReplyDeleteThere is so much pressure to hurry up and sleep through the night, wean, start solids, force "independence" and "self-soothing." Of course you and your husband do not seem caught up in this, but there is just so much pressure to go that way that it can creep into the back of a new parent's mind so easily.
"This too shall pass" is so good to remember - the hard, frustrating moments will resolve, and the sweet, amazing ones tend to move by too quickly.
advice from a teacher: read to your child! it makes a huge difference later on who was read to and who wasn't as a child.
ReplyDeleteBE present, every moment, breathe, and hold on tight because you guys are embarking on one roller coaster ride that won't ever stop! And when you think you got a hold of things, you will want another child, and then continue the roller coaster on double speed!
ReplyDeleteAll My Love..
The best advice I can give you two is to make time for each other. When she is a little older and people offer to watch her, take them up on it and go see a movie or go out to lunch or something. It's funny when my husband and I go out now without kids, it seems like we never have anything to talk about. :) But, just spending time with him alone is special.
ReplyDeleteMy simple advice is to be present. Kids grow up so quickly, schedules get busy, and time flies by. Marvel at the little things, and enjoy the little moments.
ReplyDeleteBlogged about it here:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.missionvegan.com/another-giveaway/
Posted on Facebook (Meredyth Hite).
ReplyDeleteYeah, definitely not a parent, nor will I pretend that I know how. Yet I do have a lot of baby-sitting experience, a little brother 8 years younger than myself, and enough "baby" cousins to fill a couple of mini vans. I even helped my aunt throughout her whole labor and birth of my cousin. I agree with all the great advice given above, especially Krysta's comment about not comparing yourself to other parents and questioning your methods. TRUST yourself!
ReplyDeleteMy advice to new parents is to ACCEPT HELP. In the beginning many of my aunts felt like a bad mom if they didn't do everything themselves. They ended up just wearing themselves out, which is definitely not healthy. But seriously, mamma (and daddy) needs rest too. So accept the help while it's being offered, because people seem to want to help less and less as the kid gets older. Good luck getting a friend or relative to take the kid for a couple of hours while in their two and throwing tantrums!
My best advice is to ask for help when you need it - even if it only means you need to take a nap! I would be super stoked to win these ebooks - thanks!
ReplyDeleteOh, I don't have any children so I'm not sure what advice to give! I'd say to enjoy every minute you can, because as they say, "the days are long but the years are short" and your child will grow up fast.
ReplyDeleteSavor each and every moment :)
ReplyDelete<3 Amanda
Don't forget to take time for yourself and your relationship!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I made a FB post for this post! :)
ReplyDeleteI'm not a mama yet but I would just suggest to buy lots of very large memory cards. Kids are so cute, I can never help but take a million pics! <3
ReplyDeleteI am not a parent, but I have parents (hehe)...the only advice I can give is to always show love and respect for your children, especially when they grow up.
ReplyDeleteI just tweeted!
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I would LOVE to win this!
ReplyDeleteI'm not a parent myself, but I am a nurse and my advice is to stick with your gut instinct when you think something isn't right with your child. I know a lot of parents can be overly cautious and nervous, but if something doesn't feel right and you aren't getting the advice/answers you need keep pursuing it. You know your child best. I know you did a lot of research looking for a pediatrician and it sounds like you got a great fit. I hope I am that lucky when I have children.
Thanks! *fingers crossed*
I tweeted (@hawkjen)
ReplyDeleteI'm not a mama, but I am a proud auntie and the daughter of two loving people. The best advice I've seen them put into practice is to take the time--even if it's just a few minutes a day while Kamea is napping--and reconnect with each other as adults. It seems to make everything else a bit more manageable when you remember why you wanted to make a baby with this person in the first place.
ReplyDeleteRelax as much as possible and enjoy each moment no matter what you have to do to do this!
ReplyDeleteEnjoy!
Let go.
ReplyDeleteRarely will anything go exactly the way you want it to. It's just not possible with children! I had to have my second child to finally release my expectations, plans and sometimes desires. I am a lot happier as a wife and mother when I just go with the flow.
My best advice is listen to your baby, trust yourselves, and enjoy the little moments--even the ones that have you tearing your hair out.
ReplyDeleteRemember that Kamea is a little person and deserving of all the respect any other person deserves, but at the same time, YOU are the parents, and sometimes what you want/need for her trumps what she thinks she needs (this of course is more applicable when she's a little older).
My best advice (as a mom of a now 16 year old) is to develop routine as much as possible, so you all get good sleep...we were way too flexible in regard to nap, bed times and eating times, and as a result, it's been very difficult for my son to organize himself - and he didn't sleep through the night until, exhausted, we finally let him cry it out at age 3, with 6 pacifiers in the crib!
ReplyDeleteMy best piece of advice is to not be afraid of coddling your child too much. I know so many parents who are afraid that their child will grow up and be too dependent or too sensitive if they are coddled, but I couldn't disagree more. If anything giving your child all the love you possibly can will allow them to grow into their own, independent, stable person as they get older.
ReplyDeleteHi Kristen! I just posted your link on my FB page! Loving your site, new to raw foods...so much fun and feeling so good! Alisa
ReplyDeleteEveryone has already given such great advice. I ditto treasuring each moment because children grow so fast! Making time for your husband and for yourself is also a great idea. I would also say be flexible and roll with the changes because the only constant in life is change.
ReplyDeleteMy two children were born at home and were home schooled through 9th grade. My advice: It's not what you put it, it's what you don't take out that matters most. And, instead of giving gifts to you child on the 1st birthday give gifts to people whose input made you a better parent that first year. Tell them thank you.
ReplyDeleteI posted your link on my face book page.
ReplyDeleteas i am not yet a mama, not sure i am qualified to give any sort of advice...
ReplyDeletewhat i can tell you and greg is this: to love your little one with all of your hearts and always listen to your hearts...because your hearts will always make the right decision when it comes to kamea...never ever miss one moment...and always laugh...laughter is always the best medecine...and love one another (you and greg) even if you don't always agree with the other's idea...never lose sight of what is important...all three of you!!!!
congrats again!!!
<3
Teach by example. That is the best way children learn.
ReplyDeleteTrust your instinct - mommy (and daddy) intuition is a real thing! And read "Protecting the Gift" by Gavin de Becker. :)
ReplyDeleteMy parenting advice is to relax and enjoy your time with your baby :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for entering me in the giveaway :)
And I blogged about the giveaway here on my blog:
ReplyDeleteI just tweeted about the giveaway! Thanks for entering me.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget about each other!
ReplyDeleteAbundance: As a new parent it can be very easy to focus on lack - lack of sleep, lack of control, lack of clarity, lack of confidence, lack of time, etc.
ReplyDeleteMy advice - focus on abundance and it can transform the entire experience. Abundance of health. Abundance of love. Abundance of time with your daughter. Abundance of beginnings. Abundance of curiosity. Abundance of discovery. Abundance of life!
Sorry for the typos in the previous message. I meant to say, "It's not what you put in, it's what you don't take out that matters most."
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I are empty-nesters who are now low fat, low sodium, low glycemic index vegans. I found your blog today because a vegan friend posted it on her face book page. I'm so glad I checked it out.
You are very clever. Great trait for a new mom. Wishing you much success.
I posted the link on my FB page. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd...I shared your link on my blog as well.
ReplyDeleteReally experience each moment, be present in it, and lock it away in your heart. Time with our babies escapes us much too quickly...and even more quickly with subsequent children.
ReplyDeleteTake it one day at a time. Savor every part of their lives. Trust God to lead you as you parent them. He is perfect and makes no mistakes so He's the best person to learn from both by example in the Bible and by words that He will whisper to your heart. That's my advice.
ReplyDeleteI posted about it on my facebook page - http://www.facebook.com/fruitfulvine.
ReplyDeleteLove being in the moment that you are in. The moments go by fast, even the sleepless nights, the every hour or so nursings are just a blip in time. Each little mile stone is an amazing gift to you from your baby. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteI tweeted about it - http://twitter.com/FruitfulVine2/status/18484544811
ReplyDeleteI blogged about it - http://bit.ly/cQ1uVu
ReplyDeleteIf she ever suddently stops doing something she loves, find out why. It might take some gentle coaxing, but it's very important to know.
ReplyDeleteI think it is important for parents to challenge their kids, like trying new sports and activities, meeting new people, learning about different ways of viewing the world. If their parents don't help them expand their horizons no one will!
ReplyDeleteAbove all, teach your daughter than most people in this world are good, if only given a chance.
ReplyDeleteI don't have childre myself. But I would just say you schould take it easy, follow your heart and gut :)
ReplyDeleteTrust your own truth/intuition! Don't get hung up on labels. I tried to do a style of parenting with my second that was leading to exhaustion and slight depression. So I ditched what didn't work for me, kept the rest that I loved, and developed my own plan that worked best for me and baby. You are unique! Learn to differentiate between "principles" that are true and "practice" that is individual interpretation of that principle. Do the principles; modify the practice to suit you.
ReplyDeleteHave put a link on my facebook site. And thanks for a great dehydrater book :)
ReplyDeletepia.groen@googlemail.com
Hallo my advice is very simple LOVE, love your girl, hug her anytime, telling her how much you love her, how much she means to you,may be she doesn´t understand words, but she understand the way how you telling her. I have 1 year old girl, I love her, she is the essence of my life I have wainting for her a lot, praying for her to become....but sometimes(not often) its happened that she cries and I don´t know why, then I still keep in my mind how much I love her, she is my and my husband, she is absolutelly dependent of us, we have to guard her fight for her, LOVE her. So when you will be tired, when you will don´t know what´s happen to her in that time, she will need even more hugs, more cuddling more love..........so just LOVE her!!!
ReplyDeleteCongrats to you and your family! All the advice has been wonderful - how to add to it? Maybe adding "AMAZING MOM" to your "about me" profile (your husband can do the same on his blog too)? You two did it! Enjoy...XO
ReplyDeleteHi Kristen,
ReplyDeleteI would say just keep giving as much love as you have inside to your little gorgeous girl, your hubby and to yourself. It will build ties between your family and radiate out to those you come into contact with.
I also just say to be yourselves and respect and love each others individuality and differences.
Much love to all three of you!
Casey
My advice would be to know that no one is a "perfect" mom and things happen! The dishes might pile up, and you might be down to your last pair of underwear, but spending time with your baby is much more important. Next time you blink she will be 18 and the dishes will still be there and you might still only have 1 pair of underwear! Congrats!
ReplyDeleteThe best advice i can give for raising a child and for the family is: Trust, Respect and Communication. You can't have one without the others. Practice those three things and you , your husband and kids will grow to be a wonderful family.
ReplyDelete"Be yourself everyone else is already taken"
We are still trying to have a child after several miscarriages and I came across your blog by changing my diet to help with infertility.
ReplyDeleteMy advice to you is to make sure your husband remains the most important person in your life. Listening to NPR yesterday, a woman author was interviewed and she stated that to maintain a loving and sexual relationship in your marriage after children, it is important to maintain a deep love for your husband. Many women transfer all their love and devotion to the children, thus leaving the husband on the sideline, thus leaving intimacy on the table with it. I thought it made perfect sense to be able to continue to work at your marriage and be able to share the love equally.
By the way your child is beautifully perfect. Congratulations
My advice is to keep it simple when you are tired or if baby seems a tad needier. Keep it simple by making something easy for meals that requires little prep + clean-up. Just make yourself sit and rest. Most mom's advice stems from some sort of regret (or from doing something really well) and my regret was when I added to the problem by making a mess in the kitchen or having visitors over or trying to do things around the house when I should've just sat back and relaxed!!!
ReplyDeleteEnjoy
So excited for you and your gorgeous little baby!
ReplyDeleteBest advice is to enjoy each minute you have with her, as the time passes all too quickly!
So excited for you and your gorgeous little baby!
ReplyDeleteBest advice is to enjoy each minute you have with her, as the time passes all too quickly!
My advice: I have a lot of it. But #1 I would say: don't be afraid to ask for help or advice.
ReplyDeleteI never would have made it past 4 weeks of nursing without that phone call to the lactation consultant.
I would have gone crazy if we hadn't asked the doctor about my diet while nursing (the nurse at the hospital told me to avoid beans, onions, tomatoes, garlic, broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage...).
You get the picture.
I am not a parent yet, but I know that my parents and grandparents always say they can't believe how fast time goes by. So my advice to you would be to cherish each and every moment.
ReplyDeleteMake time to laugh and be thankful with your family every day....it is the best way to cultivate a life of joy and gratitude! If you feel like crying...get it out, then focus on what you are thankful for and then find a way to laugh your way out of it! Every challenge in life can be turned into an opportunity!
ReplyDeleteEnjoy the journey...it is the destination!
Blogged about your giveaway!
ReplyDeleteNever wake a sleeping baby. Ever.
ReplyDeleteMy best advice is to trust your gut. All children are different (I'm expecting number 4 currently), and what works with Kamea won't work with your friends' kids, and vice versa. If it works for you, go with it!
ReplyDeleteTweeted as heatherGenXXL
ReplyDeleteposted a fb status update with the link!
ReplyDeleteI shared your link through facebook. :)
ReplyDeleteKristen and Greg, welcome to the "club" and what an amazing club it is! My best advice would be to really enjoy every stage fully and try to look forward to much. Every stage is amazing yet different. Enjoy every second! Yes, even the 2 AM feedings! I now miss those terribly!
ReplyDeleteI believe the best advice one could give for new parents is to just.... relax... that is all. Just relax!!
ReplyDeleteI also shared your link through lovely Facebook.
ReplyDeleteBest piece of advice. Smile lots, laugh lots and take lots of photos!
ReplyDeleteCarol :-)
Do "Child's pose" when you feel stressed. When your daughter gets older you will notice that she will sometimes sleep in child's pose. This is no accident, babies know that it calms their nervous system naturally.
ReplyDeleteI posted your contest on twitter, I'm @NTJ
ReplyDeletebest new parenting advice is to TRUST your gut and don't get suckered into believing anyone except you guys know what's best for Kamea :)
ReplyDeleteand all the other stuff we've chatted about the past few days too!
facebook
ReplyDeletetweeted
ReplyDeleteI'm not a mom, it's years before I have kids, but this is the realization I'm coming to in my own life about my own parents - NO PARENT is perfect just like no PERSON is perfect, and it's okay. You just do the best you can and she will love you.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a mom (yet!) but I do think you should be doing what you feel is the best for your child, not what the mom's at the playground thinks or what your relatives think. And of course..lots of hugs:) All the best with the new bundle of joy:)
ReplyDeletemy "baby" girl turned 18 last week, so my advice is to treasure every moment! Be present in the moments- even those nights that seem like they will never end, do! And the next thing you know you are picking out a college. :-) maybe not that fast but I am so glad I took all the moments I could to hold my girl and love her- and that's my best advice to you!
ReplyDeletePut a link on facebook!
ReplyDeleteMake sure you and your husband have regular time alone - same time every week would be ideal but ANY time would be wonderful. It's good for your marriage AND for your family.
ReplyDeleteMy advice...consider co-sleeping with your baby. It was a life-saver for me. Mama got more sleep which made everything more enjoyable! Oh, I miss those times! They pass all too quickly. ;-(
ReplyDeleteI tweeted your giveaway on twitter @JazziiDH :) Blessings to your family :)
ReplyDeleteNot sure if my sister already commented, but neither one of us are parents, but the advice I would say is to listen to your child. Listen to their stories. ; ) Have fun with them!
ReplyDeletePure2raw twins
Just tweeted
ReplyDelete@pure2raw
Pure2raw twins
The best advice I can think of is to try not to be overwhelmed or stressed, etc with your baby because she can read the energy and mirror it. I know from lots of sleepless nights that I need to learn to remain calm even though it's sometimes hard when your baby is crying and you feel like you've done all you can do to soothe her. Also, babywearing is AMAZING love love love it.
ReplyDeleteMay I enter! I don't have children (yet, hopefully) but I would say that as long as they are loved unconditionally, and they know this love, I would just follow your instincts. I think love and your child knowing that they are loved is foundational. From this it won't matter if sometimes you make the "wrong" parenting choice as it has come out of love. Sounds cheesy but I think this is true :)
ReplyDeleteJust tweeted about the giveaway :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I've posted it on my blog:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.glutenfreetriesvegan.com/2010/07/14/happy-dance/
:)
Dear Kristen,
ReplyDeletemy advice for both of you is:
-listen to your instincts no matter what other people or sources say,
-subscribe to Mother magazine,
-do not forget to breath, not only but proper breathing for time to time,
-commit to love your child no matter what,
-any hard moment just hug each other and everything will be fine.
i know you asked for one advice so what? HAVE YOUR PICK A MOTHER (YOU!) WILL ALWAYS INSTINCTIVELY WILL DO THE RIGHT CHOICE AND NEVEER FORGET THIS.
Nonetheless,
THANK YOU for your great blog. Your principles are same as mine. Hope I will win otherwise I will never afford your books -ARE PRICELESS!
Loyal reader,
Ionela
(EMAIL: ionela2005@hotmail.com)
Hmm well, I'm not a parent (yet) but from a non-parent standpoint I would suggest that you still incorporate your single friends in your goings-on because we still love you and want to know what's going on even though we don't have a wee one of our own :)
ReplyDelete(the word verification for this comment is 'winnar' - so close to winner - maybe it's foretelling something? hehehee)
I blogged about your giveaway!
ReplyDeletehttp://healthandhappinessinla.blogspot.com/2010/07/happiness-determinism-and-huge.html
While I don't have any children of my own, I had a great deal of experience with my nephews. While have a newborn and children can be hectic, make sure you make time for you and your husband. You can't be great parents if you aren't great partners. When there is a cohesive bond in the family, it's less tense. It's so easy to get caught up in the daily life that we sometimes take each other for granted or forget that we need "adult" time together. So make sure you make time for your partner and his needs. P.S. I'm due in December and love reading your blogs about how your journey as a new mom is going!
ReplyDeleteWhile I don't have any children of my own, I had a great deal of experience with my nephews. While have a newborn and children can be hectic, make sure you make time for you and your husband. You can't be great parents if you aren't great partners. When there is a cohesive bond in the family, it's less tense. It's so easy to get caught up in the daily life that we sometimes take each other for granted or forget that we need "adult" time together. So make sure you make time for your partner and his needs. P.S. I'm due in December and love reading your blogs about how your journey as a new mom is going!
ReplyDeleteWhile I don't have any children of my own, I had a great deal of experience with my nephews. While have a newborn and children can be hectic, make sure you make time for you and your husband. You can't be great parents if you aren't great partners. When there is a cohesive bond in the family, it's less tense. It's so easy to get caught up in the daily life that we sometimes take each other for granted or forget that we need "adult" time together. So make sure you make time for your partner and his needs. P.S. I'm due in December and love reading your blogs about how your journey as a new mom is going!
ReplyDeleteI just read a beautiful post from my favourite parenting blog this morning and then came to your blog and came across this competition - so this piece of advice is most forefront in my mind at the moment. Please do not think I am sharing it with you because I think you will view your dear little monkey as an inconvenience - I think you will be a very nourishing, loving and compassionate Mumma, but in the challenging moments, to keep this mindfulness that 'we are not raising an inconvenience, but a human being' - that is very powerful in restoring harmony and peace to your heart center when times can become a little challenging. Here's the post; http://theparentingpassageway.com/2010/07/13/the-mini-rant-raising-an-inconvenience/
ReplyDeleteThe Parenting Passageway is my favourite source of parenting inspiration - I am sure you will resonate with so much of what Carrie writes. Her words are beautiful - even if one is not Waldorf inspired in the home/parenting, I think that one can still draw much support from Carrie's words :) xxx Blessings on your parenting journey :) xxx
While I don't have any children of my own, I had a great deal of experience with my nephews. While have a newborn and children can be hectic, make sure you make time for you and your husband. You can't be great parents if you aren't great partners. When there is a cohesive bond in the family, it's less tense. It's so easy to get caught up in the daily life that we sometimes take each other for granted or forget that we need "adult" time together. So make sure you make time for your partner and his needs. P.S. I'm due in December and love reading your blogs about how your journey as a new mom is going!
ReplyDeleteChill out! With your first you're SOO concerned about doing everything just right, and often about what everyone else and every book and expert thinks is right. After you're broken in you find your kids just want to feel loved by parents who are happy to have them. If a goal or expectation you have is stressing you, dad or baby out, you need to step back and be sure you are choosing your battles. Everyone can see you are a thoughtful parent who cares a great deal and is well informed, so just be sure to let the love you have for your little one be your first priority. You guys will do great, even though the 1st few months (okay maybe 6 months to 2 years to some degree) feels endless and like you can't do anything right :). Sorry so long!
ReplyDeleteMy advice is to do what is best for your family. It will almost certainly be different from what others have chosen- but ultimately, you are resposisible for your choices, not anyone elses. Follow your instincts and do what you feel is best. Everybody has an opinion about everything, but they don't know your child(ren) as well as you- and you are the best person to make the choices that affect your family.
ReplyDeleteHi Kristen,
ReplyDeleteI am a homeschooling mother of two wonderful children. I have a few tips.
♦ The first would be to take your time to figure out what kind of mothering style you have. I am a structured mother who loves the freedom a schedule gives me. I have dear friends who have an elastic style of mothering and are champions at flying by the seat of their pants. The key is to figure out your style and get comfortable
♦ Secondly, get connected! If you haven’t heard of M.O.P.S (Mothers of Preschoolers) it is a great resource for women who are at home with their little ones and need to connect with other mothers in the same life stage. Having support is SO very wonderful.
♦ This was a favorite quote of mine when my kids were infants: These are the longest nights of your mothering life and the shortest years! It is so true!
♦ Finally, do not believe when people tell you…”ohh ‘just wait’..the terrible two’s are coming”…or some other life stage. What an awful way to look to your child’s future. I have yet to experience a year when I wasn’t totally aware of the blessing it is to be the mother of my children. Parenting learning curves and struggles come with job but the benefits of being part of a developing life are abundant, awesome and joyful!
Have a fantastic first year..it will fly!
<><RLE
I try to remember that the advice people give is supposed to be helpful, but doesn't mean it's right for you. I take them as "suggestions" that I can take or leave.
ReplyDeleteJust remember you are fantastic parents and don't compare yourself to others on how you raise your baby. Also make sure you make time for each other when little one is in bed x
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if this is mentioned yet, but I'd say to always remember that it was the two of you first. While parenting your beautiful daughter is so important, one of the best ways to love your daughter is to love each other well. Set some special time aside just for the two of you. All of your relationship will benefit.
ReplyDeleteBest parenting advice I can give is be the best role models you can be (which, of course, you will be) for the life that you want your daughter to have and love her unconditionally.
ReplyDeleteBeing a new parents ourself, my advice is...stay healthy :)
ReplyDeleteKristen - my best advice is to sleep with your baby (makes night time nursing so much easier and our son felt so secure), wear your baby all the time (I wore my son everywhere....while washing dishes, vacuuming, etc, and he was always happy and even slept), and nurse on demand. Your beautiful baby knows what she needs....don't be rigid in a nursing schedule. Lastly, enjoy every second....she'll be in school before you blink!
ReplyDeletesleep while the baby sleeps. :)
ReplyDeleteFor any negative comment that has to be made, always make 10 positive:)
ReplyDeleteCHERISH each and every moment, cuz she will grow up in the blink of an eye.
ReplyDeletexo!
this is by Kahil Gibran, one of my favorite philosopher and writers. I don't have children but this is how i was raised, my mother love him... I hope you raise your child also like this. :)
ReplyDeleteYour children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Your child is never too young to communicate with.
ReplyDeleteI started reading to my son when he was about 2 weeks old (He couldn't even lift his own head. My mom thought I was crazy.). We not only devoured the entire Harry Potter series together, but my son's one of the most independently voracious readers you'll ever meet.
I also talked - and listened - to my son like an adult (minus the potty mouth) before he could talk. I'd chat with him while he "helped" me with the shopping, chores, cooking and whatnot - strapped in a Bjorn, of course. The result? A teen who, so far, has no problem sharing anything with his "lame and embarrassing" mother. And since he's such a strong reader, whatever he says is well-articulated.
In any case, all the best to the three of you. Enjoy every moment, and try to take at least one pic a day.
I "got" "my" kids when their baby years where way over (I'm - not an evil, obviously - stepmom) so the only advice I can really think of is...breastfeed. You heard that one, I know :-). And congratulations big time on having your beautiful, beautiful little girl.
ReplyDeletemy advice: forget everyone's advice and follow your own intuition. :) You have everything you need to know about raising your child already.
ReplyDeleteI linked to the contest in my current blog post!
ReplyDeleteI tweeted the link!
ReplyDeleteSuggestion is to keep in mind that your little goddess is some day going to be an adult with a good memory. Something to remember in those moments when you might be feeling overwhelmed and not in your highest Light or forget and see just a baby or small child who doesn't understand. She does, she will, and she'll remember.
ReplyDeleteBe honest with your children - lying will make them question everything they believe in, because they believe most in you.
ReplyDeleteI have heard it said that you should parent the way you would if you were stranded on an island without experts,, books or anyone else telling you what to do, just your instincts. Also, Being present is helpful. I'd also remember, your not raising children your raising ADULTS!
ReplyDeleteDon't have kids yet, but i've been reading these books for ages http://www.gentlerevolution.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=SFNT&Store_Code=G (in preparation for when I do)
ReplyDeleteIts about parents playing a big role in their children's early education in a way that makes them (the kids) love learning for the rest of their lives. I have four books ie (how to teach your baby to read, math, to be physically superb, to have encyclopedic knowledge) and practiced with my friends' kids and they seem to love it. Its published by the institutes for the achievement of Human potential base din Philadelphia. There's also a publication on how to teach your baby to swim. Check them out, its worth the read.
My best parenting advice is to recognize early and daily that your kids are raising you as much as you are raising them. Be wide open to learning from them and tell them how grateful you are when they teach you something. Everyone needs to be needed, especially your children.
ReplyDeleteTake one day at a time and enjoy every moment. They grow up so fast!
ReplyDeleteInspire and encourage curiosity. Ask Kamea questions about how she thinks even the most ordinary things work or come to being. As a result, your gift to her will be that she will have a lively, interesting mind, will not become bored, and will be entertaining to others. Spend plenty of time doing sports with her; not only will that keep you close together, she will have an able heatlhy body with which to support that brilliant mind.
ReplyDeleteI know and love you and Greg a lot, so it's hard to imagine telling you to do anything you won't do instinctively. Simply give your daughter a sense of her own value and worth, and she will be fine :)
ReplyDeleteI hope I win!
When you start feeding your baby, dont force food on them. You can reintroduce foods to them every once in a while and eventually they may like it. But don’t force them to eat something. They are more likely to come around if you don’t force the issue.
ReplyDeletetweet tweet
ReplyDeleteParenting Advice:
ReplyDeleteFeel, act, and go with what your heart tells you. To me parenting is not a "learned" skill so much as a part of our being.
Don't be fooled, you will be exhausted, unsure of yourself and doubt everything you have ever known; thought was true about parenting and love. Something changes in you when your first child arrives (and the second, third, etc.) It's ok to be crazy, doubt yourself, love more than you think you ever could, put everything else on hold, and restructure your priorities for that little being. Cry, yell, be frustrated, tired, get angry but most importantly soak in the total grace of unconditional love that makes even the unsure mom and dad bask in the glory of parenthood.
(p.s. your mother, mother-in-law, sister, aunties, friends and the crazy lady in the grocery store don't have all the answers)